“…The exquisite realization of health;
O I say these are not the parts and poems of the Body only, but of the Soul…” Walt Whitman
“No tears, no time to cry
Just makin’ the most of life” As sung by Mariah Carey
“I sing because I’m happy
I sing because I’m free…” Civilla Martin and Charles Gabriel
Lately, I have received good news about my health with little fanfare. No jumping and down. No shouting. No fist-pumping or high-fiving or end zone-dancing. I think about it. Instead, I take it in and breathe. All that training in mindfulness is put into practice for several moments of serenity. It has made these milestones sweeter somehow.
In the last two weeks, I took on a new role. While resuming my professional duties, I also became my own nurse. My morning routine once again shifted to include a wound care session. Every day, I gathered my supplies: mirror, scissors, gauze pads, wound cleanser spray, and a Muppets bag M got at Subway containing skin protectant film, swabs, large Band-Aids, and Aquacel dressing. I would remove the previous day’s bandage and shower (oh the joy of a real, warm shower without the incessant beeping alarm or the soggy plastic bags). Then I’d pack my own wound and tell my body to heal, heal so I can be cleared to travel and cleared to exercise. Once a week, I would take measurements as my home health nurses used to do and I began to see rapid progress. Even before yesterday’s appointment, I knew I would hear good news. Still, it was nice to hear my nurse say, “You’re free.”
Of course, this journey is far from over. I will continue to dress my wound with topical ointment. My wound will close in a week or two. The scar from my surgery won’t heal for several months. I will have to be aware of any changes in my body, to see if the IGM is responding to my daily medication. In the immediate future, I will resume exercise to regain muscle and cardiovascular fitness.
I know I could have tied on my new running sneakers last night and gone out for my first run since February’s Superbowl Sunday 5k. I know I could have worked out this morning. But as with the removal of the Wound-Vac, the removal of the wound packing felt odd. As before, I felt vulnerable and exhausted. I slept better than I have in a few weeks.
This morning, Rambo and I watched a movie about the end of the world and how one family faced it with serenity and with love. Because along with wound care technology and the quality medical professionals I am fortunate to work with, I know I have made it through this experience because of my will, the love of my family and friends, and the serenity that comes with accepting God’s grace.
All is blessing.