I finally know exactly what I want in a man. The checklist Frannie and I created all those years ago fell to the wayside for both of us in recent years. She is happily married. I am single(though for a weekend, like my beloved Golden Bears,I had almost reached my goal and was ready to change my relationship status on MySpace, only to be derailed) but I am clear on two qualities I seek.
1. I’m looking for a man who appreciates me. I’m done with being taken for granted. I don’t want to be the sole initiator, peacemaker, gift-giver, and shot-caller. I want him to travel the miles, make the calls, and show me I am worth the effort. I am a wonderful woman with a lot to offer someone who wants to reciprocate as a partner.
2. I’m looking for a man who has his life together. Many of the men I have had relationships with were in a state of transition when I met them. Nice Guy had just dropped out of his doctoral program and was moving back to SoCal. Romance had applied for his dream job in Italy. Soldier had just fathered a son and was recovering from an accident that may or may not have been a suicide attempt. My latest suitor just lost his job. I, on the other hand, am set in terms of career, faith life, and vision. My finances and overall health are still in process but I have no plans to make major life changes anytime soon. Unless it’s marriage and/or children. I am ready to make the effort to settle down with a life partner/husband who shares this particular priority.
Transition is healthy. Now I simply have to meet someone who wants to share an important one with me.